Post 6: Money Talks – How We Handle Finances as a Throuple: TINK edition

What does TINK mean? Triple, Income, No Kids. Sounds fun huh?!

Keywest 2014

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Money can get messy in any relationship, and when you add a third person into the mix, people assume it’s 'chaos'. But honestly? It’s not that complicated. Every throuple figures out a system that works for them—some split everything equally, some keep finances totally separate, and then there’s the hybrid approach, which is where we land.

Since Caleb and Will have been together the longest (hello, Navy years and learning how to budget on a military salary), their finances have been combined for a while. But they’ve always kept separate savings accounts and long-term retirement plans because independence still matters. When Daniel came into the picture, we had to figure out how to balance things in a way that was fair and easy to track—without making it feel like we were running a business instead of a relationship.

Bills, Rent & Grocery Runs:

Some things are super easy to split. Rent and utilities? Divided by three. No arguments, no overcomplicated formulas. Grocery shopping? We use a shared credit card, swipe as we go, and at the end of the month, we split the bill evenly. No one’s out here Venmo-requesting $4.82 for coffee creamer.

Tracking shared expenses is a big deal, though. No one wants to feel like they’re carrying more than their share, and money stress can wreck even the strongest relationships. Sometimes it’s easier to say, “I got this one, you get the next,” and it always evens out in the long run. But making sure we’re all aware of where money is going keeps things smooth.

Traveling as a Throuple:

Three plane tickets are not cheap, but this is where we get strategic. Over the years, Will and Daniel have hacked the points system so well that by the time we actually get a break in our schedules to travel, we’re usually booking tickets with rewards. The only real cost is saving for hotels, food, and whatever random excursions we throw in last minute.

We estimate the costs ahead of time, and everyone tries to set aside their third. But if one of us is short when it’s time to book? That’s not stopping the trip. Money is important, but memories matter more. There will always be a bill to pay—it’s called adulting.

Personal Spending & Gift-Giving:

We might share a life, but we don’t share everything—we each have our own separate accounts for personal purchases, mostly so we can still surprise each other with gifts (though, let’s be real, we all use the same delivery accounts, so secrets are rare).

Birthdays are easy—the other two cover everything so the birthday guy just gets to enjoy. For holidays, we keep it simple—one gift per person, which means you always get two solid gifts. Works for us! To keep things fair, we usually set a spending limit so no one feels pressured to go overboard.

The Big Stuff – Buying a House & Planning for the Future:

Buying a house together? That happened fast. We knew we wanted to live together, thought about renting, and then realized that in SoCal, rent = mortgage. So we figured it out, pooled our money, came up with a down payment, and made it happen. And thank god we did back in 2017, because if we had waited, we’d be looking at tiny homes in the middle of nowhere right now.

As for our land in Hawaii? Funny enough, it was originally supposed to be in Alaska. We put in offers, got outbid over and over, and finally took the hint. Hawaii ended up being the smoothest real estate transaction ever. We had a budget, stuck to it, and now we have our retirement escape plan in the works.

Retirement & Legal Stuff – The Things We’re Just Now Figuring Out:

Does a throuple need three separate retirement plans? Yep, and we each contribute to our own. Our goal is to stay on track with yearly contributions, but let’s be honest—it’s a work in progress.

The legal side of things—wills, healthcare decisions, financial protections—is something we’re just now diving into. Owning a business, house, land, and a life together means we’re looking into Trusts to make sure everything is protected. It’s a topic we’re still learning about, so maybe we’ll come back to it in another blog once we’ve got a better handle on it.

Final Thoughts – No One-Size-Fits-All Plan:

There’s no perfect way to manage money in a throuple. Every relationship is different—different incomes, different living expenses, different goals—so you have to figure out what works for you.

For us, tracking everything is key. We literally have an Excel spreadsheet that updates every time we swipe our shared credit card. It divides the expenses automatically so we can see exactly where we stand. If someone needs extra time to pay something off? No big deal—as long as it all evens out in the end.

So, that’s how we handle finances as a throuple! If you have questions or want to share how you manage money in a relationship, drop it in the comments—we’d love to hear!💸😆

Life Lately: Spring Break, Border Talks & Work Chaos

Whew—where to even start? Let’s just say that nephew break time was exactly what we needed. We took him straight to the border—literally yards from the fence—and explained, 'That’s Mexico, and we love them.' A little life lesson before beach hopping from Coronado to Del Mar, wrapping up the day with an amazing dinner in PB at a New Zealand restaurant. Not too shabby for a spring break itinerary.

The real highlight, though? The Wild Animal Park Safari. We did the 90-minute tour, and OMG, I have never seen someone so excited about animals. Watching him absolutely lose it over giraffes and rhinos was priceless—proof that some experiences are worth way more than any dollar sign. But let’s be real, we’re not going to be the 'cool uncles forever', so we’re soaking it in while we can.

Wild Animal Park - 2025

Also, can we take a moment to appreciate how amazing it is that to him, we’re just 'his uncles'? Not 'the gay ones', not 'the guys from California'—just his family who loves him. Those moments don’t happen often in this country, so when they do, you hold onto them. He knows all three of us love him, and at the end of the day, we’d do anything for him.

Now, onto the other side of life… F*** work right now. If you follow us on social, you’ve probably seen the complete shitstorm we’ve been dealing with. Never in my life have I been on a work Zoom where someone asked, “How are you?” and my only response was just crying. We’re taking it day by day and just hoping that, in the end, if we’re only in California with fairs, at least we’ll be working with the ones that value our effort and the community.

Hold on tight—because I have a feeling this is just the start.