Post 13: How We Divide Chores Without Killing Each Other

DCW
Jun 16
5 min read

Introduction:

Living with one person is hard enough—add a third, and you’d think chaos would break loose. Because let’s be honest: dishes, cleaning, and laundry truly never end.

The secret? A system that works for us—and a whole lot of patience. Here’s how we divide up the household chores without losing our minds (or each other).

Finding a System That Works

A traditional chore chart didn’t work for us. I mean, we’re grown adults—are we really going to check a sticker chart like we’re ten? No thanks. Instead, we figured out our strengths and weaknesses and just fell into our roles. Two of us work from home full-time, so we knock out tasks between Zoom calls. It’s become second nature to tidy up while the other person is on mute or in a breakout room. Our vacuum might as well have its own meeting ID at this point.

The golden rule in our house? If you see something that needs to be done—just do it. No announcements, no nagging. We’re all living here, so we all contribute.

Who Does What?

We’ve all got our preferences, and luckily, they rarely overlap in a bad way. Will thrives in the garden, Daniel is the go-to for turtle and chicken time, and Caleb? He is the king of organizing. If you can’t find the spare batteries, a pair of scissors, or the light bulbs—it’s because Caleb decided they needed a new home and forgot to mention it. It keeps life spicy.

Of course, not everything is sunshine and roses. No one—and we mean no one—likes flipping the chicken run. It’s dirty, it smells, and on a bad day, you’ll unearth a hidden mouse nest. The shrieks that come out of grown men in that moment? Iconic.

Cooking and cleaning are collaborative. Will does most of the cooking (thank you, chef), Daniel and Caleb trade off on dishes, and everyone pitches in for dog duty. House cleaning usually happens during the week when Will and Daniel are home, and Caleb brings the deep-cleaning thunder on the weekends.

Dealing with Procrastination & Messy Phases

So what happens when someone drops the ball? If it’s time-sensitive—like someone forgot to pick up turtle lettuce—someone else just handles it. Otherwise, it waits, but rest assured that the group reminders will roll in until it’s checked off.

Dishes don’t pile up. We rinse, load the dishwasher, and whoever’s around when it finishes unloads it. It rotates naturally, and there’s no need for chore resentment.

Need help? Just ask. Or, be like Will and announce that you’re asking for help… with flair. Either way, the job gets done.

Splitting the Big Stuff

When it comes to house projects, Caleb and Will are the dynamic duo—whether it’s building a deck, painting, or insulating the shed. Daniel jumps in whenever needed, and together we’ve pulled off some pretty impressive upgrades. Honestly, it’s given us confidence that we can handle our next place, even if it’s on an island.

Grocery shopping, however, is a group adventure but on an app. Are all three of us going to Vons together? That’s how you accidentally spend $400 and end up with three boxes of some random snacks. Now, we use a shared app where we add items, track totals, and split the cost three ways. It’s kept us honest, on budget, and slightly less impulsive.

Bills and maintenance? Split evenly. If something breaks, whoever is home handles it. If there’s a mess, you clean it. It’s not rocket science, and no one wants to walk into a poop-splosion that someone left behind. Please and thank you.

Keeping It Fair & Avoiding Resentment

The golden rule here is simple: don’t let anyone feel like the housemaid. If someone’s had a crazy week and the rest of us notice, we step in. Help without being asked. Say thanks. Do something kind in return when you can. That’s how we keep it balanced.

We don’t tally up who’s done what. Life moves too fast, and things need to get done. We all take turns pulling the weight, and it evens out naturally over time.

And yes, saying “thank you” still matters. A simple “thanks for doing that” goes a long way in keeping the peace, even if you’re thanking someone for picking up a mystery spill that might’ve been left by you.

Conclusion:

Our system isn’t perfect, but it works for us. There’s no one-size-fits-all solution, but when everyone’s pitching in with a little flexibility, a lot of humor, and some real-life teamwork, it’s amazing what you can get done—without losing your mind.

Now it’s your turn—what’s your best household chore hack? Drop it in the comments and help us find new (and hopefully lazier) ways to clean!

Life Update – Heatwaves, Healing, and Hype:

It’s been a whirlwind since our last blog! We knocked out a fair, did a ton of book work, and now it’s actually happening—our book comes out this Wednesday. That’s WILD.

The Fair was great but brutally hot. Like, 104 degrees hot—the highest temperature Stockton has seen on that date in 115 years. No big deal, right? 😅 The crowd was small but mighty, and the folks who braved the heat were amazing. Still, we’re hoping fairs start shifting their dates a bit because… hello, climate change.

In more exciting news, we’ve shipped out our first 20 books—all signed and stickered, ready to be devoured by readers. It’s such a surreal feeling knowing people will be reading our story. We’re nervous (because, hi, first-time authors), but excited. Just a reminder: it’ll be available on Amazon for Kindle and print form on Wednesday, June 18.

The garden is poppin’! The sunshine finally showed up, and everything is growing like crazy. Baby pumpkins are forming, jalapeños have been eaten (yes, they’re spicy), green beans are coming in strong, the watermelon vines are spreading, and we have blackberries starting to ripen. Oh—and the baby corn is here. The garden glow-up from our last post is real.

Unfortunately, it’s not all good news. Poor Rigsby took a tumble on a walk and didn’t bounce back. We thought it was just soreness, but we ended up at the ER this weekend. He’s now on strict rest for two weeks, hopped up on meds, and getting all the love we can give. We’re manifesting a full recovery and trying not to think about the scarier alternatives.

We’ve also got our biggest Fair of the year coming up—San Diego, here we come! On Saturday, June 21, we’re celebrating 13 years of Out at the Fair® where it all began. After the rollercoaster that’s been 2025 so far, it feels good to be celebrating something joyful. If you’re in SoCal, come say hi!

And last but not least—our Threads page has been poppin’ off lately. We’ve really leaned into channeling the negativity we get into memes and drag queen artwork. It’s honestly wild how much a fabulous queen can trigger people. The comments can be nasty, but it’s nothing we haven’t heard before (or gotten in email form). So we decided: enough is enough. We’re not backing down—we’re speaking up. It’s why we started saying “Because You Won’t Erase Us.” You can’t cancel Pride Month, you can’t kick people out of a country, and you can’t treat LGBTQ+ folks like less than human. So yeah, we’re posting a lot. It’s bold, it’s real, but it’s also funny—because that’s how we cope.

Until next time—stay cool, hope you grab a book, and give your pup an extra cuddle for us.

With Love - D.C.W.

3Dudes1Life